Thursday, April 29, 2010

A vent of the "experts"

Some people need to keep their mouths shut.
If you don't like the fact that our kids watch Sesame Street, keep it to yourself. Or use tact. Do you know what that is?

Last night my dear friend, Ashley and I attended our Relief Society activity. It was a sewing activity, and because we had children, we sat in the back corner to keep our children entertained and out of the way. As we were leaving, we were discussing how we missed having the kids channels. Then the lady turned around.

"I would never let my kids watch that KUED trash!"
"Sesame Street is so NEGATIVE!"
"I can't believe your kids go to bed so late"
"Shouldn't they be in bed by 8:00?"
"Blah blah Blah"


Not that I'm really that sensitive, okay, maybe sometimes, but come on people! I don't feel I need to justify the fact that my children sometimes watch tv. Sometimes we even play video games. Shh....shame on me!

So, I was thinking, just what is the best thing to do for my kids?
I know, I'm not a perfect mom, but my children are happy and healthy, even when they watch tv. Granted a little tv is much better than a LOT of tv. But I don't think, at least in my household, that banning the tv is going to make the situation better or worse.

What do you think?
Does it make a difference for you, when you are single parents or parents with a non-involved spouse?

Being a single mom is a lot harder than I ever could have imagined, and so I'm always looking for different ways to do the right thing. But what I have found is there are a lot of different parenting techniques, not one of which is the Right way, or the Only way, or the Best way. In my opinion, children are as different as the techniques that are out there. And only you - their legal guardian/mom/dad/etc - know the best way to work with your kids.

Although, I do find it funny, that many of the people and books that I have heard/read that want to offer me their advice are from those who have never been parents themselves. Not that they can't have great ideas, but I do find it a little offensive when they claim to be experts or drs, or whatever.

Okay, I'm done with my little vent. But what do you think? Thoughts?

Thursday, April 15, 2010

It's possible that I love technology more than boys...

I have learned so much through these past months of being here in Ramona. As you know, from reading my blog, I've learned about being an adult, about loving my family. This month I've been trying to focus on all the things I have to be grateful for. Not that I have been very good at it lately. But this morning, as I was sitting around at work, I went through some of my favorite church puplications. Gordon B. Hinckley's, “A Prophet’s Counsel and Prayer for Youth,” has always been a favorite of mine. I love the "Be's".

1. Be grateful.

2. Be smart.

3. Be clean.

4. Be true.

5. Be humble.

6. Be prayerful.

Under Be grateful, it says this:


"Be grateful.

There are two little words in the English language that perhaps mean more than all others. They are “thank you.” Comparable words are found in every other language, such as gracias, merci, danke, obrigado, domo.

The habit of saying thank you is the mark of an educated man or woman. With whom is the Lord displeased? He names “those who confess not his hand in all things” (D&C 59:21). That is, those who walk without grateful expression. Walk with gratitude in your hearts, my dear friends. Be thankful for the wonderful blessings which are yours. Be grateful for the tremendous opportunities that you have. Be thankful to your parents, who care so very much about you and who have worked so very hard to provide for you. Let them know that you are grateful. Say thank you to your mother and your father. Say thank you to your friends. Say thank you to your teachers. Express appreciation to everyone who does you a favor or assists you in any way.

Thank the Lord for His goodness to you. Thank the Almighty for His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, who has done for you what none other in all this world could do. Thank Him for His great example, for His tremendous teachings, for His outreaching hand to lift and help. Think about the meaning of His Atonement. Read about Him and read His words in the New Testament and in 3 Nephi in the Book of Mormon. Read them quietly to yourself and then ponder them. Pour out your heart to your Father in Heaven in gratitude for the gift of His Beloved Son.

Thank the Lord for His marvelous Church restored in this great season of history. Thank Him for all that it offers you. Thank Him for friends and loved ones, for parents and brothers and sisters, for family. Let a spirit of thanksgiving guide and bless your days and nights. Work at it. You will find it will yield wonderful results." (Gordon B. Hinckley, “A Prophet’s Counsel and Prayer for Youth,” New Era, Jan. 2001, 4)

Although life isn't necessary going the way I want it to, there are many things I am grateful for.
Here's a short list:

  • Family - I love my family. My children are my whole world. My sisters and brother are amazing. My mom is one smart cookie. And my dad is so supportive and understanding. My Aunts are awesome. Christy and Siobhan sure know how to make me smile and are great listeners. My Uncles are pretty darned cool too. And I have the cutest Grandpa in the world. And my Grammie, I love getting letters from her. Even my cousins are amazing.
  • Friends - I don't even know how I got so lucky in this department. I mean, Aubrey has been my friend since we were what, like 11 or 12. She's pretty and smart, She also has good taste in music and her whole family is like my second home. I love the Harrison family. I miss our Thursday Dinners. Heather, Deven, Aubrey, sometimes Caulene, and I would get together and take turns making dinner. I love them. Ashley has been my lifesaver out here in Ramona. I don't think I could laugh so hard with anyone about being dirt poor and facing homelessness with as much class as we do. Okay, maybe there's no class about it. But I'm pretty sure that the streets and sidewalks of Ramona would be less beautiful without me and my waddling pregnant friend walking through town. Jenn has also been a lifesaver. She has been a source of much relief, especially for my children. It's so good to know that I can have my children be somewhere safe. And I appreciate having someone to talk to.
  • Jasper, my dog. I love my poodle. I love the companionship and the security that comes from having a canine in the house. Even if he is small. (Sylar's mom found him! So, I'm down to just one dog, again!)
  • Facebook and Twitter -I love being able to just voice about anything. Even if nobody really reads it, I'm grateful to have somewhere to openly vent to everyone and noone all at the same time. It's also great to connect with all these wonderful people!
  • Technology. I love my computer, I love internet. I love my refrigerator. I love gaming in the middle of the night because I can't sleep. It's important to take out that frustration somewhere. I love my Iphone.
  • Food, mostly in the form of chocolate or La Cocina. I wouldn't complain if it were italian either.
  • CHUCK - I love laughing.
  • TV on DVD - I don't get any channels in my apartment. And I love rewatching my favorite shows. Chuck, Psych, House, Chuck, Heroes, Bones, TruBlood, Chuck
  • My apartment - I'm so grateful for a roof over my head.
  • My feet and my double stroller - they get me everywhere!
  • The Gospel - I'm grateful for my faith. Without it I would have nothing.
Well, that's a good list for now. If you weren't mentioned, it's not because I don't love you.

I am grateful for all that I have and depending on the day, I'm even grateful for the trials, because I know that they will only make me stronger. I do wish though that my life would be a little more boring and I wouldn't mind having someone to share all this excitement with once in a while. You know, a special someone. But that will come in time, I'm sure. It has to. God has promised that he wont give us trials that we aren't capable of handling. So, I am certain that these trials will pass and that there is something greater, a light at the end of the tunnel, after all this "garbage".